Dangerous word...that word "should."
There's a lot attached to that word. A lot of suffering comes from the word. A lot of pain, a lot of grief, and a lot of expectation.
That word can do a lot of damage in your life and keep you stuck completely in the past.
Maybe you've heard yourself utter the words before...
"That should have happened...this should go that way..."
But the truth is, it didn't. It didn't go that way.
When you are living in the land of should you are living in the past or the future.
When the "should" you have exists in the past, you aren't able to come to terms with what happened because you want it to go a different way entirely. You can't accept the facts and you keep on thinking that it should have gone a completely different way. You see how dangerous this is?
So what's the skill to learn here? Come back to the present moment over and over again.
When your "should" is existing in the future, you are projecting what "needs" to happen onto a time and place that you can't actually see. You are essentially diving into the unknown and out of fear (typically) wanting certain situations to go certain ways. What happens if they don't? You end up being incredibly disappointed in the current events.
You have to keep coming back to the present moment.
We are all going to have incredibly painful times in our lives that are going to make us want to project an experience onto a life we really have real idea of what's going to happen. That's ok in some ways, but the reality is you have to come back to living in the mystery of the present moment.
The dark times will always be present.
But endless suffering comes with being unable to accept the truth fully.
So...you have to view it this way. What happened happened...and it couldn't have happened in any other way.
What happens when you let go of your past and your future?
What will happen...will happen...and it will be the most perfect thing for me.
No "should."
No past...because you've come to terms with it.
No living in the future...because the only moment we have is right now.
You're living "here."
So stay in touch with the present moment and exist in the present.
Come to a world full of acceptance.
There's a lot attached to that word. A lot of suffering comes from the word. A lot of pain, a lot of grief, and a lot of expectation.
That word can do a lot of damage in your life and keep you stuck completely in the past.
Maybe you've heard yourself utter the words before...
"That should have happened...this should go that way..."
But the truth is, it didn't. It didn't go that way.
When you are living in the land of should you are living in the past or the future.
When the "should" you have exists in the past, you aren't able to come to terms with what happened because you want it to go a different way entirely. You can't accept the facts and you keep on thinking that it should have gone a completely different way. You see how dangerous this is?
So what's the skill to learn here? Come back to the present moment over and over again.
When your "should" is existing in the future, you are projecting what "needs" to happen onto a time and place that you can't actually see. You are essentially diving into the unknown and out of fear (typically) wanting certain situations to go certain ways. What happens if they don't? You end up being incredibly disappointed in the current events.
You have to keep coming back to the present moment.
We are all going to have incredibly painful times in our lives that are going to make us want to project an experience onto a life we really have real idea of what's going to happen. That's ok in some ways, but the reality is you have to come back to living in the mystery of the present moment.
The dark times will always be present.
But endless suffering comes with being unable to accept the truth fully.
So...you have to view it this way. What happened happened...and it couldn't have happened in any other way.
What happens when you let go of your past and your future?
What will happen...will happen...and it will be the most perfect thing for me.
No "should."
No past...because you've come to terms with it.
No living in the future...because the only moment we have is right now.
You're living "here."
So stay in touch with the present moment and exist in the present.
Come to a world full of acceptance.
About the Author:
Evan Sanders is a professional life coach at AYKME coaching. Dive into these great Bible Verses or these Hope Quotes to get some motivation to move forward!
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